Wearing it for Him is His/Story

 

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Having a shitty day is the pits, but it is a universal misfortune. The severity of the “shitiness” can range from being late and spilling coffee on yourself to getting a not so nice letter from the IRS. Regardless, we have go-to vices to help aid us in our times of need. For me, it can range from a perfect Manhattan in a quiet bar, or a 7 mile run somewhere where I can scream and no one will hear me (that’s reserved for the biblical days). One of the most common though and the vice that unites a majority of women is the forever faithful, retail therapy. Recently however I’ve noticed a shift in some of my friends. Instead of reaching for a new pair of booties or little dress they’ve been sliding on something a little silkier. The therapy portion of buying yourself some lingerie is more rewarding than some of the other material items that we choose as therapeutic fixes. Putting on a lil somethin’ for myself, gives my confidence that minor kick in the ass that reminds me, I am fantastic and beautiful! No matter what chaos is currently ensuing.

Plus, its my little reminder, a sexy secret. One that I am keeping with myself. A little string tied around my finger, better yet my waist or hips 😉

Lingerie acts as the blueprint and foundation of my favorite outfits. It takes something that already makes me feel good, and gives it wings.

It’s the suggestion that makes lingerie what it is. It’s that little tease of being completely naked but covered subtly by different textures and patterns that ignites the human psyche.

 

From a social and historic stand point lingerie is traditionally purchased for special occasions. It’s not really thought about until we have an excuse to have a date night. But why not make the massive meeting you have next week a date? A date with yourself. Pairing a great bra with matching panties has the ability to make you feel more put together. The more put together you feel? The better product you produce, bottom line. There’s no wrong that lingerie can do! Just like men have lucky boxers? I have lucky bra’s, bustier’s, and bodysuits! (A girl’s got to have options ya know?)

Of course sexy situations are always made better by wearing lingerie. I’m not preaching never wear them for your partners. The attitude however has an awesome shift when you put something on for yourself. I find that my mans reaction becomes irrelevant. I can look in the mirror and think, damn I look good! Truth is he’ll appreciate it not matter what, if he doesn’t? He don’t deserve ya!

So, boys? We’ll let you continue to believe it’s for you. But there’s no denying we love to lace up for ourselves.

Ladies, treat yo self!

-Tiny T

thetbar.com

Lighten Up Francis, It’s Just Lingerie!

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Why do people get their panties in a wad at the topic of lingerie?

I had issues with our signage at the old store due to the fact that the women were in bras. Mind you, they were also more covered than most people on a beach or in the local climbing gym, for that matter.

Facebook recently started rejecting our ads due to suggestive content/nudity. Again, more coverage than a bikini and the content suggested that perhaps she’d like to receive a gift from her guy. Oh my, how scandalous!

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The T*Bar when it lived in downtown Boulder

So it begs the question, what the hell? Why do people get their panties in a wad at the topic of lingerie? Is it because it suggests so much more? Sex? Sexiness? Confidence? Lust? So what if it does? We are humans and we have sex. It’s kind of how we’re built. It’s how we all got here, by the way. I personally, would prefer to embrace the attitude, and create a culture that supports it, that this is one of the bonuses of being wired with emotion, as humans-we can have fun here-as opposed to the viewing our sexuality as a means to an end.

Perhaps it’s time to take a cue from our pals across the pond. The Euros have a great sense of humor around this whole topic, from the designs of the product itself, to the cheeky humor that surrounds the marketing and distribution of the same. That’s one of the reasons many of our vendors are from abroad. Kriss Soonik and Marlies Dekkers are two of our favorites. How’s the Marlies Dekkers Gloria Pin Stripe for a power suit?

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At The T*Bar, we work really hard to make the experience fun, as it should be. So, in an effort to help break down these taboo’s and spread The TQween’s gospel, that we should be able to talk about such things and lighten up, we are going to share some of the reasons I believe lingerie matters (aside from my obvious obsession), and over the coming weeks will ask some of you to let us know why lingerie matters to you, as well.

Recently, I was visiting with a man I had a relationship with and still am very close to. While we are not together, I will hold a very unique place in my heart for this person for my lifetime. There’s a myriad of reasons why, but one reason in particular of an intimate nature, is how he made me feel when it came to my lingerie. Seen-not invisible. He always knew, and still does, if I was wearing something new or he’d not seen before.

While he never gave me lingerie (nobody ever has-*sniffle), he appreciated that I treated it as gift wrap and a playful part of who I am, whether we were going to a football game with my Gator orange underthings for good luck, or an incredible dinner at a favorite restaurant in his hometown, with a fun surprise for “dessert”. The fact that he noticed, took time to say so, and even weighed in on favorites, made me feel absolutely seen, not invisible. That is some powerful shit.

XOXO

Debby aka The TQween

#lingeriematters

VALENTINE’S DAY: THE GATEWAY HOLIDAY FOR LINGERIE GIVING

“Our bodies are our homes, so decorate them as you wish!”-unknown

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Angelina Jolie – Helmut Newton

Do it for her!
I can sadly say (*sniffle), that no man has ever given me lingerie. Me?! Le sigh. 😉 Yes, yes, I know, likely fear given it’s my profession and my extensive collection and passion for the stuff, according to my “circle of brothers”, but really, never?! Hmpf! I would have appreciated just knowing he was picking something he wished to see me in…and out of.

Don’t be that guy. We’ll help you be that “other” guy…you know, the one that thrills her – with confidence and good taste and strong sexuality.

Valentine’s Day is the perfect gateway holiday to begin the journey of lingerie gift giving. It takes some of the pressure off because, well, first she’s hoping you are going to do something for her on VD, so it’s not out of the blue so to speak (although that’s really exciting, when there is no actual reason). Second, it’s the perfect time to spice things up anyway, since the whole thing about Valentine’s Day is making the effort, to make space for love, romance, and yes-sex! It’s all part of our love lives as humans, so lighten up and enjoy the ride (ahem).

That’s why we’re here. So you get it right-effortlessly.

Aim to Please!

XOXO,
Debby

Debby’s Picks- We’ll Help You Nail It!

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It is my belief that one should not wait for Valentine’s Day to give lingerie. There are a million reasons to do it any of the other 364 days of the year. We’ll school you on this soon, but, with February 14th fast approaching, I would be remiss in not making some personal recommendations about what would be great choices this Valentine’s Day.

My top choice, pictured above, is the Lascivious Milla Bra and Thong. This is by far my favorite bra (this month, anyway) in my own collection. Having a halter neck, but wearable with anything, this bra is like the tuxedo of lingerie. Finely made, smooth, sleek, sexy, and architecturally constructed, this is a home run in my book.

For the gal that maybe is a little less edgy, but still oh so sexy, another great choice for the lover’s holiday is the Sweetest Sin Push Up Bra and Hipster. Bright, beautiful and slightly more traditional, you can’t go wrong with this pick.

Looking for something a little more Sporty Spice-like? The Lurex Stripe Bralette and Girl Short will not disappoint. Sassy, sexy and comfortable beyond imagination.

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Last, for a fun Valentine’s Day Red surprise, the Space Odyssey Push Up Bra and Thong is on point. Super playful, bright red, a little risqué, and actually really comfortable, this is a bang for your buck set. Take a walk on the wild side and turn things red hot!

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I LOVE MEN! NO, REALLY…

As long as I can remember, I have been surrounded by men.

Growing up, I spent my weekends fishing or riding dirt bikes with my Dad and my brother. Every Summer at camp, I would hang out on the steps of the boys’ bunks each afternoon because my closest allies were there, not on the girls’ hill.

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Later, in college, I would find myself surrounded by the brothers of the fraternity where I was a little sister. They were my partners in crime (some literally) and my adventure mates. I was their ear, and everybody’s “sister.” Not so sure I always loved that last part, but that’s another blog post entirely.

Post college, this trend of men in my life finally hit me, when I found myself in the Bahamas with 12 men as part of a bachelor party (and no, I was not the “entertainment”).

It wasn’t that I didn’t have girl friends, but my confidants and most of my adventures – always dudes. I am not entirely positive as to why. I never actually thought about it until my dear friend Sara, recently asked me. Best guess, without paying a therapist, in my younger years I was way more comfortable in my own skin around people that also wore no makeup and had no boobs. 🙂 Very. Late. Bloomer.

So clearly, I love men. Really.

Fast forward to the second incarnation of my adult life and opening my lingerie boutique in Boulder, Colorado. It was a labor of love, to pay tribute to the incredible strong and independent women that paved the way out West, long before my kids and I moved across the country and made Boulder home.

It was also very much my intention to shake things up and make men feel comfortable in this traditionally frilly land of uneasiness, not only by making it fun to come in and hang out a while, but ultimately, taking the fear out of all the little, sexy, silky things surrounding them. Did I mention little? Every detail of the physical store – down to the cowhides, barware gift-wrap and saddle – was intended to welcome men to the pseudo-Bourbon bar.

What I learned during the seven year life of The T*Bar, is that I not only love men… Apparently, I sorta speak dude.

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TheTBar.com was born of my melting pot of circumstances. I have a unique perspective: a lifetime of being a guy’s girl, years of successfully pulling the right information out of men when attempting to buy lingerie, realizing where the disconnect is and actually being a woman who understands sizing and what women actually wish to sport around in. Not to mention my insane obsession with lingerie. A superfecta!

After years of observing the challenges of men just wanting to do something nice (and hot) for the women in their lives – buying lingerie – it occurred to me that there was a way to ease the angst and help men do this in a painless way beyond the physical store. TheTBar.com actually helps men get it right. While doing this in store was a T*Bar no brainer, providing men the ability to get the same result, from the privacy of their home or office, enables even the most timid to join the ranks of the lingerie heroes! After all, we believe it should be equally as fun to shop for lingerie, as it is to take off. You heard me, fun!

Like the lovechild of Bettie Page and Paul Newman, The T*Bar empowers men, and the women they love, to embrace and own their sexuality in a playful, powerful and inspired way, with no apologies.

Simply put, The T*Bar is the conduit between men’s fantasies and women’s desires. Everybody wins!

 

xo-Debby

PS-Stay tuned for the new site/blog unveiling soon 🙂 For now, visit us at http://www.thetbar.com

Are you a Vixen? What is your lingerie personality?

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Let’s face it. How we dress can affect how we are viewed and how we present ourselves to the world. I am always droning on about my belief that it all starts with how we feel about ourselves, followed by what we choose to put on underneath the shell. This led me to thinking about one of my favorite blogs http://www.knickersblog.com and their lingerie personality quiz http://www.knickersblog.com/quiz Just as we have different personalities outwardly, we have different lingerie personalities. We express ourselves, like art, using these details to convey something, whether or not someone else has the pleasure of actually seeing the knickers or not!

We want you to take their quiz! Figure it out! THEN…..write in and tell us what your lingerie personality is AND visit http://www.thetbar.com and tell us what you’d pick to express that personality. One lucky winner will receive a $25 gift card to apply toward their lingerie personality selection!

Attitude adjustment!

Blush LingerieIt’s only human nature to let our insecurities get the best of us sometimes. Most likely there’s always going to be that one problem area on your body that you have a hard time coming to terms with. Let’s face it- we all do, but does it inhibit you from buying that adorable set you’ve been thinking of treating yourself to? I work in the store everyday, listening to women worry and fret over some imperfection, and then have to remind them that none of us are perfect, nor do we get airbrushed in real life (although, I have had that fantasy a few times at the beginning of bathing suit season)! Seriously, it is how you feel that matters and a quick way to get an attitude adjustment is by starting with what’s underneath. They are not called foundations for nothing! It is the foundation of how you feel all day, of how you carry yourself out your door and into the world, and most definitely, the foundation for our own self image!!!

Don’t forget to go to http://www.dailycandy.com/deals/details.jsp?id=42147 to save 30% at http://www.thetbar.com and comment on our blog to enter to win the shwag from our last post ( https://thetbar.wordpress.com/2009/03/10/sweet-as-candy/ )

Sweet as Candy!

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In celebration of you and in celebration of our new online store (www.thetbar.com) being recognized in “The Daily Candy Deals”, we are giving away
a Carol Malony “All Tied Up” set, and twenty, yes twenty,  Betsey Johnson embellished thongs!! Yes, free.
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Carol Malony All Tied Up

Betsey Johnson embellished thong

To enter, comment on this blog and you could be a winner! AND….the entire site is 30% off!! Want the deal? Go to Daily Candy Deals and sign up at  http://www.dailycandy.com/deals/

Didn’t get what you wanted for Valentine’s Day? As we always say, “Get it for yourself”!

In the spirit of what The T-Bar is all about, we are excited to celebrate the post-Valentine season with March being “Celebrate You Month” at The T-Bar. We have always said we are all about celebrating strong, independent women who love themselves! There is nothing more empowering and sexy than not waiting around, so don’t! What better way to treat yourself, than with a treat for yourself?  Get it for yourself, wear it for yourself, celebrate yourself, be yourself.

We’re here to help……www.thetbar.com

Strip Tease (after all Valentine’s Day is coming)

Recently, I received this link (http://tinyurl.com/d2evuu) about “The Bra Project” dance performance from a friend that made me think about how much I love that there are others out there who are truly as nuts about lingerie as I am—and how a good ole strip tease is sooo back in style. I swear, Kelly Anderson from “The Bra Project” must be a twin sister of mine from a different mother. Anyway, what “The Bra Project” reminded me of was not only that I really do love lingerie—and a good strip tease—but why. As Kelly puts it, “It’s more about what you conceal than what you show.” Its more about what makes you feel good, pretty, and sexy inside and how you choose to show it. Which brings me to Kelly’s brilliant “reverse strip tease,” and what would be my perfect costume for such a treat on this coming Valentine’s Day…

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I’ve always been a big fan of hats and boots. Then I began wondering about what should lie beneath the trench coat and, of course, Carol Malony Ooh La La came to mind. Who can resist this little (and I mean little!) number. 1/4 cup bra, reminiscent of the Beer Garden maids and the garter panty with removable garters! Too fun and two undies in one. Eat your heart out, boys!

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So, in honor of getting that oh-so-hot feeling and maybe inspiring some private shows for that oh-so-hot guy on Valentine’s Day, you will receive 20% off any Ooh La La purchased at www.thetbar.com between now and February 10, 2009. Just enter promo code Oohlala before going to checkout!

Now, put it on to take it off, girl.

Click here and get it now!